Infidelity In Marriages | Analysis

Published Date: 23 Mar 2015 Last Modified: 12 May 2017

Introduction

Infidelity is perhaps the most complex issue faced by spouses in the marital relationship. Usually, when the discovery of an affair is done, it can be very annoying for the person on the receiving end of the case. Obviously the blame on oneself is the primary response after the information and facts are understood and then the person must be willing to understand that he / she has failed to respect the other person to take this step. This results in a lot of pain, confusion and emotional problems for people that are involved in such a relation. This can affect the person and make him very depressed and even become suicidal. A person may lose confidence in future relationships and also the ability of having faith in people because of the enormous injustice caused by infidelity. Maybe this can lead to a process of divorce and custody battles cruel and endless tension.

Barta and Drigotas (2001) defined infidelity as "a partner's violations of norms regulating the level of emotional and physical relationship with people out side the relationship. Moreover, it is a breach of trust or an act of disloyalty in a committed relationship. In this modern era where a lot of facilities are available in the shape of mobile telephone and Internet chatting, it is greatly accessible and easier to make any kind of relationship and stay in regular contact with them. Hence, it may result in shortage of time for one to spend with his or her spouse and greater contact with outsiders. In short, it can occur abruptly and unexpectedly by intention, incidence or chance or can extend over a long period of time. They can proceed for a very short time or a life span. This is one of the key reasons for enhance in extra marital affairs and its following adverse impact on the rate of divorce and suicide.

Types of Infidelity

Buss and Shackelford (1997) report that there are two types of infidelity exist: sexual infidelity, emotional infidelity or both. Sexual infidelity is consisting of sexual contact such as kissing, touching, oral sex, or physical contact. on the other hand, emotional infidelity includes the creation of emotional affection or warmth for another individual, and can involve the actions as flirting, dating, lovely talk, feeling interest towards some one else, or falling in love.

Pittman (1989) marriage includes the hope of primariness and assurance of both partners to remain loyal with each other and keeping each other the most significant person for life time. Generally couples agree that primaries will contain the probability in which partners guarantee to have physical contact only with each other. Despite of this marital infidelity is very common across world even though, society is not permitted or accepted it. Knowingly or unknowingly, Most of marriages are now victim of this serious issue almost couples are experiencing it either being of a betrayed receiver or being of disloyal one. Even many famous persons have done marital infidelities, presidents, such as John F. Kennedy, Bill Clinton and other public figures, such as Prince Charles, Marion Barry, and Princess Diana was strongly rumored to have had an extra marital affair. Actors and actresses have long presented continual material to the tabloids on affairs and infidelity.

Gender Difference and Infidelity

Gender based studies divided into two parts. The first group of researches focused on sex differences in reaction to a partner's infidelity. Shackelford and Buss (2002) sex differences in reaction to a partner's emotional and sexual infidelity are well documented and hypothesized adaptive problems (Buss et al., 1992) Due to adaptive problem of parental uncertainly, men are more upset than women by a partner's sexual infidelity. Also, adaptive concern with parental investment and resources diversion makes women feel more upset than men by a partner' emotional infidelity (Shackelford et al., 2000).

Another part of literature about sex differences and infidelity refers to different rates of men and women involvement in infidelity. Some researchers strongly assert that men are more engage in infidelity than women (Allen & Baucom, 2004). They have significantly more sexual partners outside of their primary relationship (Blumstein & Schwartz, 1983) and they have more permissive attitudes toward sex outside of marriage (Thompson, 1984) and also have a strong desire to engage in infidelity (Prins, 1993) . At the same time, other studies suggest that men and women's rate of infidelity are becoming increasingly similar (Oliver & Hyde, 1993) and they are not differing in terms of behavior (Prins et al., 1993).

Betzig (1989) infidelity is a core base cited when pleading for divorce and those who are disloyal likely to be vigilant discussing such activity. It is neither only a male behavior while the ratio of infidelity among female is going to equal the proportion of males. Not surprisingly a third of all marriages now a days dealing with this issue. However, no doubt it is anticipated responsible of dissolution of a marriage bond cruelly. Most notably, females role have been change now they are not simply responsible for maintaining home work while working outside of home. Both male and female have almost equal opportunities due to rapid change in living structure of modern aged societies and late night travels, work related activities, and meetings these all responsible to some extent for significant increasing rate of divorce as regardless of gender no one is remain dependent on their partner for life accessories.

Causes of Infidelity

Thompson (1983) infidelity can exist in marital, or in any committed relationships. Therefore it considered an illegal or wrong act. The clarifications people often make regarding their illegal sexual terms are several and varied. Whatever the reason of an act of infidelity but it is certainly varies between and within cultures. Presence of sexual behavior is not must or always the case of infidelity. Ideas and perceptions of infidelity are might be different among people of same culture or between the people who have close relationship with each other.

Sptizberg and Cupach (1998) infidelity provides a means of exploring the darker and more problematic side of human experience with out having to examine actual criminal offending. Affairs come in diverse forms. All affairs are not surely same: they supply unusual purposes, are done by several types of persons, fueled by a range of motivations and having dissimilar effects. One of the most obvious weaknesses in infidelity research is the shortage of discrimination between types of affairs. This has often lead to erroneous, confusing and unsupportive generalizations or stat averages about the nature, implications and what constitutes effective intervention with affairs. Considerate the individual, biographical, domestic, marital and cultural-anthropological reason of affairs is vital to planning successful intervention.

Guerin et al. (1996) in a study reported that Spouse often involves in infidelity in order to protect themselves from taking responsibilities or adopting new roles. They want to escape from discomfort and pain which comes from boring and difficult marital life. With out disturbing marital life or other spouse an infidel person have has relation with person other than committed relationship. This betrayal provides him/her temporarily calmness.

Psychologist Allen (2001) in a study based on Bowlby attachment theory reports that comparatively to secure attachment a person with dismissive attachment style is probable to have one infidelity atleast to his/her spouse because he/she wants self affirmation.

Chen (2001) noted in his research findings that it is considered as a symbol of respect and privilege for a wealthy and influential personality to have has relations with the person of other than his/her spouse. Many times, these relations are secret in nature and based on long term and seldom have these affairs disturbed their primary marital life and relations.

Prevalence of Infidelity

Ninety-nine percent of married persons surveyed expect their spouse to be faithful after they are married, and 99% assume their partner expects sexual exclusivity of them (Treas & Giesen, 2000). Despite these expectations, the actual occurrence of marital infidelity is much higher. According to a survey of over 1000 Americans, done by the National Opinion Research Center in 1991, eleven percent of the female respondents and 21% of the males surveyed admitted to engaging in extramarital sex (Greeley, 1994). Thus, marital infidelity is a perplexing phenomenon and research indicates that this is also true for other types of infidelity, such as infidelity occurring in dating relationships.

Blow and Harnett (2005) report that rates of infidelity are vary across universe due to types of infidelity. Although, the prevalence of sexual infidelity is higher than emotional one and most of the infidelity researches have focused on sexual infidelity rather than emotional infidelity and almost result are drawn by non random sample. Further more the issue of infidelity is very sensitive and personal so, individual may show some kind of reluctance to disclose it or admit it openly. In Pakistan the rate of infidelity reported by private TV channel in a program among male is 45% and among female is 32% but these rates are not specifically for marital infidelity however, these rates are may be overestimated or underestimated at some point because there is no researches or official data is available in Pakistan.

Allen et al. (2005) found that 25% committed relationships are experiencing infidelity. 22% to 25% male and 11% to 15% females are unfaithful to their partners. Other less conservative reviews reported that 25 to 50% male and approximately 10% to 25% females are engaged in infidelity during the course of their marriages. An estimated figure shows the adverse effects of infidelity that almost 50% married couple across the universe are experiencing in their marriages. Moreover, these responses of infidelity can also be varied depend on individual difference or level of affection and these response can be also extremist in nature or less extremist and threatening.

Glass and Staeheli (2003) almost every marriage is suffering with the issue of infidelity regardless of love, arrange and forced marriage and status of marriage such as happy or unhappy marriage.mid life crises and other factors are responsible for trigger anyone towards infidelity (Cole, 1999).

Consequences of Infidelity

Brown (1999) found that discovery of spousal infidelity is always being distressing for both concerned spouses. Usually, sudden encounter of infidelity make them unable to behave normally. The disloyal person feel gloomy, desperate and victim of many doubts regarding his/her future marital life either it may remain joyous as it was before, he/she really feel the pain of that third person with whom he/she had extramarital affairs. Sexual life affected of a disloyal spouse in his/her marriage but despite of confession being wrong they tried ever to minimize their guilt by blaming others for the responsibilities of their infidelities (Chen, 2001).

Bergcross (1997) in a study concluded that many probable risk factors including suicidal thoughts, homicidal, health issues, are the result of infidelity. Many others responses are noted such as violence, divorce, dissatisfaction, flirting behavior, revenge, angry, jealous, shame and so on.

Some studies showed that only a small percentage of couples who experience infidelity can save their marriage after an affair (Hansen, 1987) and all marriage with infidelity do not end with divorce (Charny & Parnass, 1995). Studies about consequences of infidelity showed negative outcomes like: rage, lost of trust, decreased personal and sexual confidence, suicidal behavior, depression, damaged self esteem, fear of abandonment and surge of justification to leave the spouse (Charny & Parnass, 1995).

Spanier and Margolis (1983) concluded that partners who divorce because of their spouse's infidelity experienced less depression than those who end their marriage for other reasons. The unfaithful spouse has initiated the divorce but the faithful spouse is more likely to develop depression. When a person discovers a partner's infidelity, he should decide about forgiving the partner and remain together or end the relationship. Shackelford et al. (2000) found that men and women who face different adaptive problems over evolutionary history related to various types of infidelity have different reaction to partner's infidelity. It is more difficult for men to forgive a sexual infidelity than an emotional infidelity and they are more likely to end a current relationship following a partner's sexual infidelity (Shackelford et al, 2002).

Evolutionary theory

Evolutionary theory (Nannini & Myers, 2000) supported the view that gender difference present in response to partner's infidelity (Sheets & Wolfe, 2001) and provides one explanation for gender differences in reactions to infidelity. According to this theory, a man is jealous about his female partner's sexual infidelity, because if his partner has intercourse with another man, there is no guarantee that offspring he raises with her are his genetic children. The uncertainty of paternity gives rise to excellent reasons for a man to be intolerant of adulterous sex in his partner. A male in this position may contribute resources to this offspring, as well as squander opportunities to reproduce elsewhere (Buss, et al., 1992). Using this same model, a woman is concerned about her partner becoming emotionally attached, lest he abandon her for the new partner, leaving her to rear their offspring without resources or assistance from the father. If her partner is investing more assets into another woman's offspring, whether in a monogamous or polygynous relationship, it is to the detriment of her children.

This theory is consistent with results wherein women overwhelmingly selected emotional infidelity as more distressing, and more men selected physical infidelity (Harris & Christenfeld, 1996; Whitty & Quigley, 2008). Additionally, physiological studies support this perspective, finding that men demonstrate greater autonomic arousal response to sexual infidelity and women have a greater response to emotional infidelity (Buss et al., 1992).

Buss (1995) and other evolutionary psychologists argue that men and women differ in their responses to infidelity in ways that has resulted from different adaptations to different reproductive problems. The evolutionary perspective does not dispute that both forms of infidelity, emotional and sexual, are disturbing to both sexes. Instead, evolutionary perspective argues that "men and women put different 'emotional weighting' on the different aspects of infidelity" (Buss et al., 1999).

The theory is consistent with a good deal of research data. However, there are some noteworthy shortcomings inherent in this perspective. Firstly, the core premise of the standard evolutionary model is that sex differences in mating behavior exist as a consequence of the differential costs for each sex to reproduce their genes (Buss & Schmitt, 1993). Infidelity can be efficiently explained this way by advocates of this theory in the light of higher rates of male infidelity historically (Allen et al., 2005). The theory acknowledges that members of both sexes pursue extra-pair/short term strategies; however, recent research findings show that rates of female infidelity are rapidly closing the gap (Allen et al., 2005) and the theory at present does not appear to adequately address this. In two studies (Harris, 2002; 2003) of responses to actual infidelity, men and women showed no difference in the degree to which they were distressed by emotional vs. sexual infidelity. Furthermore, both males and females reported focusing slightly more on emotional than sexual aspects of their partner's infidelity.

Roscoe et al. (1988) significant differences have not been found in several studies of 'actual', as opposed to 'potential', extradyadic behavior (Feldman & Cauffman, 1999; Seal et al., 1994). Further, studies including aspects of infidelity apart from sexual behaviors are another example where significant differences between the sexes have not generally been found. Wiederman (1997) for example, found that there were no differences in the type of infidelity entered into or in the incidence of infidelity for men and women under the age of 40. Clear gender differences in the incidence of infidelity are difficult to determine in the light of such inconsistent research.

Divorce

Buss and Shackelford (1997) infidelity leads to divorce and is most likely the single most harmful thing that can occur to a marriage. Divorce refers to the often messy and painful dissolution of a marriage. Either for good or for bad, divorce is a very ordinary incident in recent days. Most everyone has been experienced it, either by going through it themselves as a spouse or a child, or knowing someone who has gone through it as a spouse or as a child. Regardless of recognized understanding with the sound effects of divorce.

Waite (1995) good psychological and physiological health of both spouses can be achieved by stable and satisfied marriage; it also contributes to marital wealth and children wellbeing. But the fact is these all advantage only possible when marriage protective from high conflicts. Severe mental and emotional health problems can be protected by a sound marriage. a part of knowing this well known realities some marriages still suffer from problems and endless issues and spouse their selves are responsible for that issues which causes marriage beak downs. Surely, an unstable marriage is responsible for adverse outcomes for all family members and even upon other concerned relation.

Rate of Divorce

Vaus et al. (1997) most young adults when surveyed about relationships indicate that they want to marry and have a committed, trusting, respectful relationship for themselves and for any children they may have Any attempt to explain the reasons couples separate and divorce must take into account both the nature of marriage as an institution within a given social and cultural context, and its particular meaning for the individuals involved. It's remarking that the dramatic increase in the lifetime divorce probability from 10 percent to more than 50 percent in the United States and to 25 percent in Pakistan since the 1960s cannot be explained only at the personal or micro level.

Dagatan (2012) investigated there is a significant raise in the rate of divorce universally on the account of everyday. Day by day Marriage is losing its worth especially in some specific societies. Many reasons are attached to failure of stable marriages such as infidelity, violence, financial crises and so on. Russia is standing on top for highest divorce rates with 5.30% while panama with 3.80% is on 4th ranking of highest divorce rate due to infidelity. Similarly, there is surprising increase in the rate of divorce in Pakistan from few decades. Currently 10 to 15 divorce cases are being filed by females per day in Pakistan. However, divorce rates are varying in different status it's higher among upper class while middle class takes divorce as a stigma and comparatively to other classes its prevalence is low in lower class.

Effect of Globalization on Divorce

Mansfield et al. (1999) the degree to which family law reform may influence rates of divorce is debatable. In many perspectives, especially for women marriage is not only remaining the source of financial security, social status in the community, sexual activity and social companionship. Globalization has affected the thought and living structure and values across culturally. Now almost every sphere of the world people have different and more liberal attitude regarding divorce while it's not consider stigma as it was. Now men and women both talk about it openly. Across the entire main reasons for divorce, women more than men tended to initiate the separation and be more likely to have sought counseling advice prior to separation. The perceived reason for divorce did not appear to influence whether men or women made preparations for living without their partner.

Gender, Attitude and Divorce

Differences between men and women emerged mainly in relation to specific spousal behaviors. Women were significantly more likely than men to mention abusive behaviors their spouse's drinking and drug use and being the victim of physical and emotional violence as the main reason for divorce. Although ending a marriage can never be easy and may be traumatic or have detrimental consequences for either or both partners and any children involved the majority of women and men, whatever the perceived reason for divorce, claimed that in retrospect they still would have separated and felt they never wanted to get back with their former spouse. Again, women who mentioned abusive behaviors as a reason for divorce were most emphatic in their agreement with this statement (Waite et al, 1995).

Impact of Divorce

Bowlby (1969) a broken Marriage always left highly significant consequences. As one grow older, build new relationships with numerous important figures throughout one's lives. It is natural to form affection with the people who care for them most, in regards to their physiological and emotional needs. However, marital relationship is considering the most respective way to form relationship with people of opposite sex. In marriages there are some obligations which should be followed by both spouse and it's obligatory on them to respect each other values and expectation but if any spouse doesn't care these values then marital dissatisfaction can come in existence and divorce or marital conflict occur in result which impact badly on physical, emotional and psychological health.

Walsh (2008) reported that marriage is source of getting respect, status, and recognition in a society. Psychological satisfaction can be got through marriage by which individual get kids, companion for life and completeness of home structure. As it is truly said man is a social animal therefore, man cannot survive in isolation for goodness of life one need to be remain with others. Marriage is regarded as a best source of getting all these things it provides peace and emotional support on individual level. Both concerned partner sooth each other by providing their support in all situation of life. But at the same time it's a very weak as well as strong one. Divorce shelters all of these and affected must feel hopelessness and experience high emotional torture that sometime intend a person suicidal.

Suicidal Ideation

Suicidal ideation, attempts and completed suicides are all referred to suicidal behavior. Weather suicidal ideation refers to any thought, intention which is readily made to harm one self or its any self inflicting behavior in which one is thinking to take his/her life. It happens most often in reaction to a crisis such as the loss of a relationship, death, inevitable life situation where one's feel extremist level of hopelessness, worthlessness and infidelity in highly affiliated relationship. Usually, people experience a variety of feelings during the time of crises, and each person's shows different response towards crises even in same crises. It is common to feel scared or worried or depressed. If a person feels overwhelmed or unable to cope, he or she may try to commit suicide. Thus far researchers have been unable to predict potential suicidal consistency so effectively (Goldstein, 1999).

Causes of Suicide

Suicide is defined as the act of intentionally taking one's own life. It happens most often in reaction to a crisis such as the loss of a relationship, death, inevitable life situation where one's feel extremist level of hopelessness, worthlessness and infidelity in highly affiliated relationship. Usually, people experience a variety of feelings during the time of crises, and each person's shows different response towards crises even in same crises. It is common to feel scared or worried or depressed. If a person feels overwhelmed or unable to cope, he or she may try to commit suicide. Thus far researchers have been unable to predict potential suicidal consistency so effectively (Prokorny, 1983).

Overall it is on 8th number cause of death through out the world, it's a major, preventable public health problem. Psychological causes may be one factor of it like unable to cope depression, it may be due to lack of others supports, or burden of guilt, to examine the feelings and love of other people, relationship failure, shock on incident like infidelity or divorce. It may have also origins from cultural and social pressure often in case of isolation, although, the act of suicide is varied in distinctive cultures and ages.

Foster (1999) various risk factors have been studied with suicide like divorce, financial issues, marital conflicts, life satisfaction, depression, unemployment, parental deprivation and many others. Researches claim that emotional instability, psychotic disorder, major depression, personality disorder, substance dependence, marital status and affairs are usually responsible as a major cause of suicide. Despite of these known causes many other reasons can be responsible for this act. Actually, suicidal ideation or suicide is usually an individual act. There may be individual causes present for such act. However, the more common causes associated with suicidal ideation are marital affairs among married and parental or other factors are related to unmarried persons.

Suicide in Pakistan

In past, official statistics for suicide in Pakistan was un-available. Nevertheless, there was some evidence suggested by NGOs, newspaper reports, police that the suicide ratio has slowly been raising in Pakistan from the last few years. The increasing inclination has been very theatrical with almost 3,000 cases of suicide being reported in 2001 nationally, "Even this is considered to be an underestimation, as it is well known that in many developing countries suicide tends to be grossly under-reported." In the month of Ramadan of 2012 a private news channel surveyed that near about 300 people attempted suicide during Ramadan and this rate of suicide is very alarming and surprising.

Particularly, "many factors are associated with the phenomena of suicide which cannot be treated in isolation from the societal and emotional factors compelling a person to think about this act". Like other developing countries, Pakistan, too, faces the dilemma of increasing cases of suicide. Suicide is view different in every society depending on its culture and religion. For instance, Islam, Judaism, Christianity and some western cultures take it negative and sin. Its wrongly consider as a result of mental illness. Even in some societies it is considered a crime. But on the other hand, in certain situation it's regarded as a symbol of honor like suicide bombers, in battle, etc.

Larsson et al. (1998) reported that the probability of suicidal attempts in course of an individual life could be assessed by the history of suicide in one's family members or other social network like friends etc and also by considering the level of suicidal ideation. Suicide is considered as a major preventable public health issue and ranked on 8th leading cause of death world overall. It may have also origins from cultural and social pressure often in case of isolation, although, the act of suicide is varied in distinctive cultures and ages. Many decades back suicide was understood the issue of only western countries. Since 1960's somewhat suicide cases reported in under develop countries including Pakistan but in Pakistan no official statistic data record were available. Nevertheless, reported cases are considered under estimated.

Khan et al. (2008) a study conducted in Karachi, reported that risk factors of suicide include, negative and desperate or stress full events, marital status (marriage), unemployment, and psychiatric disorder are considerable indicators of suicide. There was some other evidence suggested by NGOs, newspaper reports, police that the suicide ratio has slowly been raising in Pakistan from the last few years. The increasing inclination has been very theatrical with almost 3,000 cases of suicide being reported in 2001 nationally, "Even this is considered to be an underestimation, as it is well known that in many developing countries suicide tends to be grossly under-reported".

Bertolote and Fleischmann (2002) every year near about one million people die due to suicide universally. According to a report by WHO less number of suicide cases are reported by outside of western countries especially from Pakistan, Bangladesh and Indonesia. These less reported cases of Pakistan may be the result of unavailability of official record of suicide in earlier decades and secondly, it is an understudied subject in Pakistan. Many factors including religion, legal and social issues make it difficult to collect data regarding suicidal behaviors. However, in the month of Ramadan of 2012 a private news channel surveyed that near about 300 people attempted suicide during Ramadan and rate of suicide is very alarming and surprising. This proportion is very threatening especially an underdeveloped country with lesser reporting record of suicidal cases globally.

Khan et al. (2000) numerous hurdles are present in open discussion of phenomenon of suicide in predominantly Muslim country Pakistan. However, suicide is view different in every society depending on its culture and religion. For instance, Islam, Judaism, Christianity and some western cultures take it negative and sin. Its wrongly consider as a result of mental illness. Even in some societies it is considered a crime. But on the other hand, in certain situation it's regarded as a symbol of honor like suicide bombers, in battle, etc. Particularly, "many factors are associated with the phenomena of suicide which cannot be treated in isolation from the societal and emotional factors compelling a person to think about this act". Like other developing countries, Pakistan, too, faces the dilemma of increasing cases of suicide.

Hassan et al. (2009) two years based research an analysis of suicide findings shows more than 300 suicides were committed in different cities of Pakistan. It reported that mostly men who commit suicide were unmarried and men 2:1 0utnumber of females. While in case of women a quite opposite result of men has found. Majority of suicidal committers were under the age of 30 the most prominent reason for suicide was domestic problems such as health issues, poverty, social pressure, forced marriages, marital conflicts. On the other side the most common adopted method of suicide were firearms, insecticides and hanging.

Anonymous (1989) a cross national research on 71 nation result showed that an independent effect of Islam in lowering the rate of suicide is considerable when others factors like economic imbalance and social injustice are controlled. However, study showed Muslim countries as compare to non Muslim countries have considerable less suicidal ratio. Nevertheless, suicides occur on regular basis in Muslim countries also because some remarkable evidence has met by many Muslim countries like Bangladesh, Iran, and Turkey.

Mahmood (1989) study evidence showed the underestimated death by suicide perhaps due to legal procedure by which one is subject of convicted and financial penalty. Analyzing the report of 17 Islamic countries reports experts say that this is due to cultural and religious impact that in many Islamic countries suicide is culturally and religiously unacceptable act so, it must be possible that such cases are never disclose as suicidal and due to this reported lowering rates of suicide are fake.

Khan et al. (2006) reported with the increasing number of suicidal cases it is now a major public health issue in Pakistan. Yet the increasing rate of suicide in Pakistan is not negligible as it is considered while it occurs on regular basis. A higher level of rates achieved if age and gender calculated together.

Aziz et al. (2006) in one study suicide was reported higher than last few decades. Sample of that study was calculated from at least 35 cities and towns (and their surrounding villages) of Pakistan. Suicide has been reported from most major cities of Pakistan including Karachi, Larkana, Lahore, Multan, Bahawalpur, Faisalabad, Rawalpindi and Peshawar. Suicide has also been reported from the remote Ghizer District, in the Northern Areas of Pakistan.

Khan and Naqvi (2007) Crude rates vary from a low of 0.43/100,000 per year (average for 1991-2000) in Peshawar to a high of 2.86/100,000 for Rawalpindi (in 2006), with other cities falling in between: Karachi, 2.1/100,000 (1995-2001); Lahore, 1.08/100,000 (1993-95); Faisalabad, 1.12/100,000 (1998-2001) and Larkana, 2.6/100,000 (2003-2004). Gender- specific rates show that for men, highest rates are 5.2/100,000 in Rawalpindi , while for women the highest rates are 1.7/100,000 in Larkana. The highest age- and gender-specific rates for men and women are in the age group 20-40 years: 7.03/100,000 and 3.81/100,000 in Larkana respectively. Recently, a non-governmental organization reported 5,800 suicides in nine months (January to September) of 2006.

Link among Infidelity, Divorce and Suicidal Ideation

Perrucci and Knudsen (1990) reported traditional concept of marriage in most cultures that it is a union until death. However, the breach of marital bond is related to human worldwide. Sadly, infidelity is also one of the most widespread issues a married couple often has to face. Figures vary on this issue, but it's usually reported that 60% of men and 40% of women will participate in an extramarital affair at some point during their married life. It's the intensity of disloyalty and emotional pain that often leads to divorce. Such damages to emotional bonds are rigid to put aside and many people feel there is no way to ever restore faith.

The degree of damage depends on the nature of the infidelity and how it is discovered. Usually, the foundation of mutual trust is threatened. Some fear that the marriage will end, while others fear being replaced in their spouses' sexual fantasy (Schnarch, 1997). Having sex may trigger painful memories, and sexual resentment or inhibitions may develop. Some are vulnerable to shame of rejection (Nichols, 1991). Flashbacks, health problems, suicidal thoughts and homicidal threats may occur (Berg-Cross, 1997). The temptation to retaliate is strong, and the potential for violence is present. Some become obsessive, thinking repeatedly about what has been happened and trying to make rational sense of it (Brown, 1999).

Rationale of the study

Families are experiencing many issues today, but the role of infidelity in this regard has been often ignored because its negative effects have been subtle, yet dangerous. This issue has enough serious worth by nature that is responsible to change the structure of whole family. It's really a very common issue of a marriage but unfortunately, still it's poorly understood as compare to others issues like infertility, financial problems and so on. In fact, evidence of infidelity existence in marriage is stem from many later decades. Most of the works on infidelity and empirical researches have been carried out in foreign countries while based on clinical experience, limited researches and opinion. Fortunately, it's now catching the attention of researchers and they are now inclined to interrogate its role as a serious issue of committed relationship. But still in Pakistan there is no official record or research data available on the issue of infidelity in marital relationship.

On the other hand, divorce rates are getting increase day by day since 1960. An underestimated report of divorce states that 1 out of every 10 marriages ends on divorce and infidelity is among them one of the leading described cause. Evidence suggested that daily more than 100 petition are being filed in courts for divorce in Lahore. Similarly, the existence of suicide is evident from the time immemorial.

However, the ratio of suicide among married couples is lesser than un-married or divorcee. But, literature provides the suicidal evidence of married couples. There must be some inevitable shocking affairs inclines some one to take such step and perhaps, the discovery of their spousal infidelity or divorce is one reason of suicide. In the past it was a commonly held belief that suicide was the problem of western industrialized countries but now it is a major health problem even in developing countries. A study has reported that 5000 people attempted suicide from 1997 to1999 in Pakistan. In spite of this fact it is a poorly studied subject in our country.

Pakistan being an Islamic country has prominent religious impact on its culture. Infidelity and suicide both are considered curses and sin in regard to religious perspective. Divorce is also looks badly although, religiously it is allowed but as a least one option. But from few decades there is alarming and surprising increase of the rate of infidelity, divorce and suicide in Pakistan which is something vulnerable in itself. Therefore, a study of infidelity as a risk factor of divorce rate and suicidal ideation is pertinent. So for such studies have been carried out mostly in foreign countries. The investigator intends to verify the role of infidelity on likelihood of divorce rate and suicidal ideation among married couples. The intention is to look more closely the response and attitude related to infidelity and due to it expected divorce rate and suicidal ideation.

In contrast to previous studies, the present study aim to explore or examine the role of infidelity as a risk factor of divorce rate and suicidal ideation among married males and females, what they feel, think about the issue of infidelity how they response? Either they differ on gender basis in regard to their response, behavior and attitude towards infidelity?

The subject of infidelity is one that of great importance to the practice of therapists and even more important to the couples affected. Nevertheless, there is a surprising lack of robust and rigorous research on the topic. This study may will be of considerable value and help clinician, therapist, and married couple to understand each other expectation and values. This research may also be contributed to build a better and healthier life situation in Pakistan and decrease these curses rates from Pakistan.

Objectives

Quantitative (Part A)

To study the relationship between Infidelity and Suicidal Ideation among married males and females.

To study the predictive role of Infidelity for Suicidal Ideation among married males and females

To explore role of different demographic variables like Age and Gender between Infidelity and Suicidal Ideation among married males and females.

Qualitative (Part B)

To examine perceived definition of Infidelity in general society.

To find out the predictive role of Infidelity for Divorce among married males and females.

Hypotheses

There is positive relationship between Infidelity and Suicidal Ideation.

Suicidal ideation is more for married females as compared to married males.

Infidelity is more for married males than married females.

There is more Infidelity and Suicidal Ideation in Adults as compare to Adolescent of married males and females.

Chapter-II

Method

Setting

This sequential mixed method study comprised of survey and semi structured interview was conducted in colonies (Faisal Town, Green Town, Iqbal Town, Gulberg, Model Town, New Housing Scheme, Shah Rukne Alam Colony) of urban area of Tehsil Liaquat Pur of District Rahim Yar Khan. The residents of these colonies were mainly belonging either to middle class or upper class.

Participants

The participants included for the study were married, divorced and had more than one marriage and having age between 20-50 years with at least having matriculate education. The persons who was widows or belonged to lower social class (income less than 7000 per month) or refused to participate or sick enough not to fill the Performa or out of the city at the time of study were excluded.

Sample size of 75 married females and 75 married males (N=150) was taken by non probability sequential purposive sampling technique for the survey while every fifth male or female was taken for semi structured interview (N=30). Informed consent of the participants of the study was taken before conducting the study.

Research Design

This study was mixed method cross sectional research using quantitative and qualitative approach. Study objectives regarding infidelity and suicidal ideation were achieved by quantitative research (Part A) through the administration of infidelity scale and suicidal probability scale and objective regarding infidelity and divorce was achieved by qualitative research through semi structured interview (Part B).

Operational definition of the variables

Infidelity.When one partner in a committed relationship is disloyal and either has sexual or emotional intimacy or combination of both other than to his/her committed partner. In Urdu it is equivalent to BEFAWAI.

Divorce. Dissolution of marriage is before the death of either spouse.

Suicidal ideation. Strong impulse or thoughts to kill one self.

Instruments

Following instruments were used in quantitative and qualitative research.

Part A

Infidelity scale. Infidelity scale used in present research was adopted by researcher from the marital adjustment Scale-R (MAS-U) developed by Kazmi (2010). Original scale was applied on divorce couples to find out the leading factors of divorce. This scale was comprised of 110 items. MAS-U is an establish framework through marital adjustment and marital disharmony can be estimated in Pakistani culture by researchers and practitioners. This scale is standardized and available in Urdu language. This scale had 06 subscales. Infidelity scale is one among of these subscale and used in research as an infidelity scale. It was a five point liker rating scale and numerical weightage assigned to each category of response options 5 (strongly agree), 4 (agree), 3 (undecided), 2 (disagree), 1 (strongly disagree).

A subscale of MAS-U which is related to infidelity issue had been used by researcher of this study and the reliability of this subscale is 0.91 which is highly accepted. Infidelity scale consisted of two subscales which were as follows:

Emotional infidelity. 7 items (items: 1, 3, 4, 7, 8, 9, and 10).

Sexual infidelity. 3 items (items: 2, 5, and 6).

This subscale was comprised of 10 items and used as an infidelity questionnaire. All the items of this subscale were about infidelity. Higher (30 or above than 30) the score on this subscale items means infidelity is present and lower score shows good marital relationship. Subject of the study were asked keep in mind that if they discover that their spouses are involved in the activity mentioned in the said item, give their responses, in the form of strongly agree, agree, undecided, strongly disagree, disagree. If the total score was 30 or more than 30 infidelity was likely.

Suicidal probability scale. The Suicidal probability scale (SPS) was developed by Cull and Gill (1990). Scale is comprised of total 36 items. It is self report measure that assesses suicidal risk in adults and adolescence. Subject of the study were asked keep in mind while filling up questionnaire that if they discover that their spouses are interested someone else hence, having a marital relationship with them. what would be their probable most response, thought, attitude after experienced real/imagined such issue in their marriage they were asked match and rate the frequency of this subjective experience with items of given scale and post behavior using the four point likert scale ranging from not at all or at some time=01, to some extent= 02, most often= 03, truly all time= 04. All the responses then hand score. An overall assessment of suicide is reflected in summary score. The maximum to minimum score range is 144-36. The greater the score is greater the risk or probability of suicide. If the person scored above than 72 he or she was said to be having suicidal ideation 'likely'.

Part B

Semi structured interview. Semi structured interview was used for qualitative information (Annexure E). Qualitative research interviews have been defined as "attempts to understand the world from the subjects' point of view, to unfold the meaning of peoples' experiences, to uncover their lived world prior to scientific explanations (Kvale, 1996). The purpose of this research was to collect opinion, experience, perception, thought or feeling of married, divorced/ another marriage after divorce male and female in their marital life about infidelity and outcome of infidelity in marital relationship or infidelity as a risk factor of divorce. It consisted of face to face interview of six open ended questions.

It has been suggested that there are certain stages which need to be followed in designing and implementing an interview study (Kvale, 1996). Study (study involving married males and

females) therefore involved the following stages;

(1)Thematising. The purpose of study was decided as well as topic which needed to be

investigated (for example, one topic of interest in the study was what acts are called infidelity (in Urdu BEWAFAI) in perception of research participant?

What might be participant's reaction if they get know their husband/wife is infidel?).

(II) Designing. The overall design for the study, including the later stages of analysing and reporting was planned. Researcher planned six open ended questions for semi structured interview.

(III) Interviewing. The interviewer is the instrument in this type of evaluation. Semi structure interview guidance was followed for effective interview. Interviewing data was recorded by paper pencil notes.

(IV) Transcribing. Each interview was transcribed as soon as it was completed. Only three interviews took place in two sittings and the rest were all completed in one sitting.

(V) Analysing. Data analysis was carried out initially by researcher. Analysis began as soon as the interviews had been transcribed.

(VI) Verification. Researcher tried to be careful during interviews and sent the transcribed interviews to interviewees to confirm whether they agreed or disagreed and wanted to add or remove anything

(VII) Reporting. Once the analysis was complete researcher wrote the results for journals and for this thesis. Interviewees' names were not mentioned in any of these reports.

Procedure

Quantitative Part A

The researcher, herself, visited door to door to select and distribute the proforma I. Participants were asked to fill up the Performa's after assuring them their identity would not be disclose and the information given by them only would be used for research purposes. Prior to implement research questionnaires demographic information was obtained from selected participants and Performa I (infidelity scale) was distributed to all the participants after getting back Performa only those participants who scored 30 or more than 30 were selected for research participation and contacted again for second questionnaire (suicidal probability scale). They were asked to fill Performa II themselves after imaging the situation (or if he/she had real experience) within 48 hours and to contact the researcher on her mobile in case of any query. If the selected participant was not present at home but was within the city he/she was later contacted and performa was given. The researcher collected the Performa after 48 hours.

Qualitative Part B

For qualitative analysis semi structured interviews based on Performa III were conducted with every 5th male and every 5th female participant. Before conducting interviews a proper formal invitation to participate in interview was proposed to selected participants. A written interview schedule was designed with the ease and consent of participant. Individual interviews were conducted by researcher with each participant in evening time as that time was suitable for participant and researcher could easily approached to selected participants. Interviews were conducted at the suggested places by participant itself. At fixed schedule day of interview researcher contacted participant on phone to remind them about interview time and assured their availability with their consent at the fixed time, place and day. Total six open ended questions (Annexure-F) were asked by researcher from the selected participants. Every individual interview was lasted for 42 to 69 minutes as per the ease of participant some interviews were conducted in two to three days as those participants had have real experience of infidelity by their spouses and shared it openly with researcher with their own willingness. To answering the proposed questions made them emotional and became upset therefore, researcher provided them relax and supporting environment and conducted interview with them in two or three sessions and also for demand of the interview procedure, a flexible and comfortable environment was assured for every interviewee. Researcher developed very good repo with interviewees before conduction of interview and assured them not to disclose their identity and answers provided by them would be used only for research purpose and all the data concerned with them would be discarded after attaining results. For the record of qualitative data researcher proposed audio recording to participants of the study but only five participants allowed for audio recording therefore, researcher recorded paper pencil notes for participants.

Data Analysis

Quantitative Part A

Statistical analysis. The data of Quantitative study was analyzed through SPSS version 18. The mean and standard deviation was calculated for quantitative data. The independent t test was used to compare quantitative data. P value less than 0.05 was taken as significant.

Qualitative Part B

Thematic content analysis. The Semi Structured Interview was analyzed through thematic content analysis. Transcription of interviews started as soon as the process of the interviews started. The interviews were transcribed by the researcher. The interviewees were ascribed numbers (for example I_30 for thirty Interviewee) which were used in the transcription and writing the results. Three of the research team (MN, MN, MA) closely read transcriptions and when they became available, identifying topic of interest (open codes) whether because they already existed in literature (for example, attitude toward infidelity) or they were important because of the areas the study wanted to explore (for example, response towards partner's infidelity). The researcher worked on this separately and exchanged notes during the meetings with supervisor. Research supervisor provided supervision and support through telephone and email throughout the study. Regular meetings were held in which emerging themes, concepts and conflicts were discussed. These separate readings were compared and discussed in details throughout the period of study. This helped to construct a synthetic set of codes to guide not only the next interview but also the analysis of the transcripts. This process was repeated, thus modifying the working codebook till a final set of codes was obtained. The process stopped when saturation point was reached and the researcher realized that no new themes were emerging. Finally the data were reorganized into wider themes (for example intimacy, divorce) and categories (for example physical involvement, deception, punitive).

Chapter-III

Results

Quantitative Analysis

Part A

The current study proposed to examine the relationship between Infidelity and Suicidal Ideation among married male and married female. To collect the data certain psychological instruments were used. To check the infidelity, infidelity scale was used and furthermore, to check the suicidal ideation, suicidal probability scale was used. It was compulsory to establish psychometric properties of these instruments therefore; different statistical procedures were carried out to analyze the data. Psychometric properties of the scales were established by computing item-total correlation inter-subscale correlation, and Cronbach's Alpha. Pearson Product Correlation method was used to determine the relationships between variables of the study. Independent sample t-test and ANOVA, Simple Regression and Simple Logistic Regression were used to find the difference between married male and married female along demographic variables like Age, Gender.

Table 1

Item total correlation for the Infidelity Scale (N= 150).

Items

R

1

.32**

2

.21*

3

.33**

4

.19*

5

.39**

6

.61**

7

.53**

8

.58**

9

.61**

10

.60**

Table 1 indicates the Item total correlation for 10 items of Infidelity. It is clear from the results that most of the items for Infidelity scale have significant positive correlation with the total score indicating a highly significant internal consistency of the scale.

Table 2

Item Total Correlation of Suicidal Probability Scale (N =150).

Scale items

STPM

r

1

.26**

2

.31**

3

.35**

4

.33**

5

.41**

6

.50**

7

.46**

8

.34**

9

.33**

10

.41**

11

.55**

12

.49**

13

.62**

14

.64**

15

.47**

16

.67**

17

35**

18

.15**

19

.57**

20

.72**

21

.72**

22

.25**

23

.64**

Scales Items

24

Continued…….

STPM

r

.63**

25

.40**

26

.65**

27

.67**

28

15**

29

.45**

30

.67**

31

.72**

32

.22**

33

.25**

34

.34**

35

.23**

36

.40**

Note. *p <.05, ** p<.01

Table 2 indicates the Item total correlation for 36 items of Suicidal Probability Scale. It is clear from the results that all of the items for Suicidal Probability scale have significant positive correlation with the total score indicating a highly significant internal consistency of the SPS.

Relationship between Variables of the Present Study

To determine the reliability of the translated instruments, Alpha reliability and Pearson Correlation were computed. This correlation was based on sample of married male and female.

Table 3

Correlation Matrix between Infidelity Scale and Suicidal Probability Scales (N = 150).

Variable

α

M

SD

1

2

3

4

Infidelity

.80

183.72

185.67

-

.40**

.39**

.61**

PI

.75

45.36

5.68

-

.55**

.20*

EI

.70

40.41

11.09

-

57*

SPS

.78

34.01

10.23

-

Note. = Inter subscale correlation as indicator of construct validity of respective scale; SPS =Suicidal Probability Scale, EI= Emotional Infidelity, PI = Physical Infidelity

*p ≤ 0.05, **p ≤ 0.01

Construct validity of the scales. Table 2 shows that significant positive correlation between Infidelity and its subscales. Hence, shows that same scale is quite valid.

Cronbach Alpha reliability. Table 2 shows alpha reliability for SPS and Infidelity. The reliability analysis shows that alpha coefficient for the total scale of SPS is .75 and Infidelity is .80, Physical Infidelity = .75, Emotional Infidelity= .70. Which is quite satisfactory.

Correlation between Infidelity and SPS as Perceived by married male and female. Table 2 clearly indicates the positively significant correlation is between Infidelity and Suicidal Ideation. Further table shows that positive significant correlation between Physical Infidelity and Suicidal Probability whereas positive significant correlation between Emotional Infidelity and Suicidal Probability.

Differences on Variables of the Study along Demographic Variable among married male and female

The demographic information of participants were collected along with, Gender and Age.

Table 4

Differences between married male and female on Infidelity Scale and Suicidal Probability Scale (N = 150).

Married Female

(n= 75)

Married Male

(n=75)

95% Cl

Variable

M

SD

M

SD

t(198)

P

LL

UL

Cohen's d

Infidelity

78.04

09.801

80.69

10.738

.16

.87

-4.58

10.84

-

SPS

1.80

.403

1.87

.342

1.09

.24

-.92

9.72

-

Note; SPS =Suicidal Probability Scale

The results reveal that no significant difference is found on Infidelity Scale and Suicidal Probability Scale among married male and female. Further result shows that married males are more indulged in infidelity and Suicidal Probability than married female. Cohen's d is not calculated that's why both results were not significant

Table 5

Differences along Age on Mean differences on Infidelity and Suicidal Probability Scale were calculated between married male and female were also being calculated through One-Way ANOVA (N=150).

20-30

(n = 65 )

30-40

(n = 45 )

40-50

(n = 40 )

95% Cl

Scale

M

SD

M

SD

M

SD

F

i-j

Mean. D(i-j)

S.E

LL

UL

Infidelity

73.38

13.21

61.68

12.23

58.25

24.6

11.14**

1<2<3

2<3

13.80

9.13

3.71

3.20

79.99

71.26

89.0

79.49

SPS

19.45

2.78

13.17

2.97

10.47

3.02

2.42*

3<1<2

2.11

.63

15.4265

16.9227

Note; SPS =Suicidal Probability Scale; between group df = 1, within group df = 173, group total df = 3, *p ≤ 0.05, **p ≤ 0.01

Table 5 indicates the results of One Way Analysis of Variance for Infidelity and Suicidal probability and different age of married male and female. The data shows a significant effect of Infidelity, Suicidal Probability and different age of married male and female. (p < .00). Table shows significant the mean differences of married male and female on Infidelity and Suicidal Probability. Highly significant differences appeared on Infidelity and Suicidal Probability. On the basis of significant differences, Post-hoc analysis using Bonferroni correlation was carried out to study differences in detail.

Table 6

Simple Regression for Infidelity as Predictor for Suicidal Probability of married male, and female (N=150).

Independent Variables

B

SE

β

t

Constant

.41

.155

2.62**

Infidelity

.02

.002

.61

9.32***

R 2change

.37

F change

86.85**

*p ≤ 0.05, **p ≤ 0.01

Prediction of Infidelity for Suicidal Probability of married male and female

Table 6 indicates that Infidelity is positively significant Predictor for Suicidal Probability such as the value of R2 change .37, with F (1, 175) = 86.86, (p >.00) explains variance of .37% by additional effect in Suicidal Probability of married male and female.

Table 7

Linear Logistic Regression Analyses for Infidelity and Suicidal Probability as Predictor for married Male and Female (N=150).

PERCENTAGE OF ACCEPTANCE(95% CL)

Predictor

B

S.E.

Wald Test

ODD RATIO

High

Low

Constant

2.26

1.47

.19

1.10

-

-

Infidelity

.34

.00

.20

1.60

1.01

1.22

PI

.45

.02

.64

1.10

.92

1.31

EI

.34

.02

.41

.236

.91

1.26

SPS

.13

.01

.06

1.0

.95

1.31

Note. SI =Suicidal Probability Scale, EI= Emotional Infidelity, PI = Physical Infidelity; Entries are coefficient from the regression, B = unstandardized regression coefficient; SE=standardized error estimate of the regression coefficient = COEFFICENT interval, Wald are the test of significant, distributed as the chi square with I degree of freedom, Odd ratio are related to the probability of the participant infidelity, suicidal probability of married male and female. The parentage of acceptance is a function of the regression equation computed for each variable. Percentage are listed for the participants who are high (one standard deviance above the mean) versus low (one standard deviance below the mean) for each measure. *p ≤ 0.05, **p ≤ 0.01

Summary

Results of the current study provide evidence through Model Parameter Analysis.

Evidence Steps

P value significant level

Homsmer-Lemeshow Probability

Classification plot

Cases plot (histogram of the predicted data)

Hit ratio

All the above mentioned steps were developed in the light of Model Parameter Analysis. Results of present study were fulfilling only the third criterion that is Classification plot but not fulfilling the first criteria of p-value significance level that is why it can be concluded that logistic regression is non-significant. In addition it shows that Infidelity, Emotional Infidelity and Physical Infidelity are not significantly predicting the difference among married Male and Female.

.

Qualitative Analysis

Part B

The current study (Part B) proposed to examine the relationship between Infidelity and Divorce among married males and females (N=30). To collect the data semi structured interviews were conducted to find out the predictive role of